Smoke-Filled Rooms

This weekend there were a couple of more stories about politicians who were forced to step down because of inappropriate comments, rants or crazy statements made in emails.  We have all read similar stories about business leaders who seemingly forget that email and Twitter messages can, and most likely will, be shared.

Let's assume, for arguments sake, that these pols and business leaders are of at least average intelligence.  Let's further assume that they have an average level of engagement with the world.  We already know they have email and Twitter accounts after all.  So we will assume that they aren't Luddites who are just discovering electronic things for the first time.  Finally, let's assume that these political and business leaders are not purposely engaging in self destructive behavior; that they want to keep their jobs and reputations.

So what gives?

Why are so many of these presumably smart and capable people saying really, really stupid things in emails and on Twitter?

A friend of mine claims that they have always said these really, really stupid things.  We just now get to read and hear about them.  I suspect there is truth to that, but I suspect there is something more to it.

I think that today's leaders are missing the smoke-filled rooms of days gone by.  You know, those back rooms of lore where they could hang with their cronies and say whatever they wanted without fear of ridicule or retribution.  Where everyone laughed at their jokes and acted on their suggestions.  Where a little off-color joke or comment was one of the trappings of privilege.

The smoke-filled boardrooms, filled with syncopatic yes-men and women, who raised the CEO up like some sort of demi-god, was where major corporate decisions were made.  The smoke-filled rooms populated with politicians and their allies is more than just a Hollywood construction.  They exist(ed) and that is where political parties decided who would be the next mayor, senator or governor.

With a greater emphasis on transparency, not to mention smoke-free buildings, smoke-filled back rooms and board rooms have all but disappeared.  While this is positive for accountability, and lung health, and makes for stronger business and political decisions, it does create a void for business and political leaders who need some place to blow off steam.  They need a safe place to let down their hair, tell a ribald joke or social zinger without anyone calling them racist or sexist or any other kind of -ist.

With recording devices on virtually every cell phone and plenty of places to upload whatever is recorded, how is a politician expected to feel comfortable that she is with sympathizers who agree with some of her more extreme views?  How is a CEO expected to relax when she knows that every clerk and janitor who has their nose out of joint because of work conditions or pay disparity could record a random comment, taken out of context, that makes them seem greedy, or devious, or stupid?

It seems, like so many others, they have turned to Facebook and Twitter.


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Public Speaking is NOT Open Mike Night

Many "experts" on public speaking, right after they tell you to picture the audience in their underwear will tell you to start with a joke.  It loosens up the audience, they say.  Makes them like you and more receptive to you and your message.

The problem is, telling a joke to a large group of people is hard!  There are lots of reasons for this including the subjective nature of humor, the importance of delivery, the wariness of most audiences these days when a speaker sets out to tell a joke, and the fact that most jokes have only a tenuous relation to the topic of the speech.

I like to use humor when I give a presentation, but I rarely tell a joke.  Rather, I prefer to make a comment on my presentation or the circumstances of the event.  I like using situational humor because it shares an observation with the audience, which helps to create a connection.  Wry or slightly sarcastic comments can come off as more natural and spontaneous than set jokes.  I do usually plan these comments, but I don't always use them.  I try to read the audience and judge how well such comments will be received.  There is nothing more disheartening than making a comment that you expect will result in laughter and instead getting silence.

You should ONLY use humor in a presentation if you are comfortable with it. Don't feel that you have to tell a joke.  Also, if you do decide to use humor, you should NEVER make jokes that are disparaging or degrading to someone else.  More often than not, those types of jokes are alienating and will work against you as a speaker.  I tend to use self disparaging comments, where I make fun of myself, which for some reason often gets a laugh.

And for the record, I have never pictured an audience in their underwear.  I am pretty sure that would make me forget where I was in my presentation!